Ted: Dude, you shaved your freakin' head.
Marshall: Yeah, yeah, but it's good. I ought to shave it all off. What a great solution. Just be bald 'cause it's cool, right? Bruce Willis, Michael Jordan, Britney Spears... Oh, God, what did I do?! How could you let me shave my head?!
Ted: What?!
Marshall: You're the worst best man ever! I hate you! I'm not going out there! I'm leaving and I'm never coming back. I'm gonna go find that money under the rock by the tree and go live with the guys on the beach in Zihautanejo.
Ted: Dude, those guys are criminals.
Marshall: Only Red Andy was falsely accused.