Marshall: Okay, that's it. We are all now seriously too old to keep doing this to ourselves. I vow here and now that I shall never again get that drunk in my life.
Future Ted: [v.o.] Yeah, he'd wind up breaking that vow.
Marshall: And I will not break that vow, as sure as I will always have a full head of hair.
[flash-forward to a balding Marshall with Lily in 2020:]
News Anchor: [on TV] In other elections today, in the race for New York State, Supreme Court, Judge Brad Morris... Oh, oh! Just look at him. Oh, I would love to rub that down. Ahem. Sorry. Has increased his sizable lead over Judge Marshall Eriksen.
Marshall: It was supposed to be a victory party.
Lily: You ran a great campaign, baby.
Marshall: Yeah, but it was the most stressful three weeks of my life. [a poster for the campaign shows Marshall with a full head of hair]
News Anchor: And in other results, a surprise comeback. We're ready to call the New York State Supreme Court race for Judge Marshall Eriksen. We'll go to Judge Eriksen for a live statement in just a few minutes.
Marshall: Come again for Judge Fudge?
[later, to the TV cameras:]
Marshall: As your next commissioner,
Lily: State Supreme Court Judge.
Marshall: ...of Gotham City...
Lily: The State of New York.
Marshall: I vow to make Batman work harder. I say shine that Bat-Signal even for small stuff, like, uh, shoveling snow. Or like, uh, if a police horse dumps out in the park.