Lily: We're not gonna say anything.
Marshall: What? Why?
Lily: Marshall, if we tell them, we're basically inviting them into the most private, intimate moment of our lives.
[fantasy scene of Lily and Marshall kissing in bed:]
Barney: [enters] You guys banging? [both scream] Keep going. I'm not even here. But just for the record, having a baby, huge mistake. Now show me what you got.
Ted: Uncle Teddy's here! [both scream] Quick question. How are you guys gonna handle the whole Santa thing? I'm thinking, just be honest. Oh, hell. I'll dress up.
Robin: [appearing on TV] "This just in" [both scream] Is what Marshall Eriksen is about to say to his wife as he attempts to impregnate her. Chopper 12 is live on the scene with Baby Watch: 2010. [chopper blades whir]
[reality:]
Marshall: Okay, fine. I won't tell anybody about the baby thing.