Jill Quote #932
Quote from Jill in What a Drag
Jill: And it's not the whole story. I was... I got stoned at a Led Zeppelin concert. I bought some dope that was laced with something.
Brad: What was it laced with?
Jill: I don't know. But I ended up in the emergency room, registered under the name Charlene Fogelman.
Brad: So you used a phony name so your parents wouldn't catch you?
Jill: No. I thought I was Charlene Fogelman.
Brad: Well, then how'd you end up in jail?
Jill: Somebody turned me in. I was messed up for a long time after that.
Tim: She still hyperventilates every time she hears Stairway to Heaven. But who doesn't?
Home Improvement Quotes
‘What a Drag’ Quotes
Quote from Al
Al: Oh... I can't believe I touched this bag! Oh, now my prints are all over it! Oh, man!
Tim: Hey, hey, hey, hey! Calm down!
Al: You know, this makes me an accessory. I could be charged with with possession of illicit drugs!
Tim: Al, Al, Al, stop, stop! Think for a minute. You found marijuana on my property. What does that tell you?
Al: I can no longer run for political office.
Quote from Al
Al: Well, hey! What's this?
Tim: What's what, Al?
Al: Looks like oregano. Does Jill keep it out here so it stays fresh?
Tim: Let me see that. It's not oregano.
Al: Tarragon?
Tim: This is marijuana.
Al: Jill cooks with marijuana?!
Tim: No, you idiot. Somebody's hiding this out here.
Quote from Tim
Heidi: Welcome to Tool Time on location. Here we are in Tim's very own backyard.
Tim & Al: [air blowing at them] It's Storm Watch '98! [Tim signals for the fan to be turned off]
Tim: Hi. I am Tim "The Weatherman" Taylor. And of course, you all know my assistant, Al "Nino" Borland.
Al: That's right. And we're here to show you how to protect your house and property from the ravages of a winter storm. [Tim makes blowing noises]
Tim: It's gonna be a long winter. Al's mom saw her shadow. Which is hard to do because she can't see her feet at this point, can she?