Randy Quote #248
Quote from Randy in The Vasectomy One
Randy: Hey, Brad, guess what I got. The girls' "best and worst" list.
Brad: I can't believe you got that.
Mark: What is it?
Brad: All the the girls in the high school pass around this list that says what they like about guys, like best hair, best eyes, best personality...
Randy: And guess who has best butt.
Brad: No way. Let me see.
Randy: Look all you want. [turns around]
Brad: Not your butt, idiot. The list.
Brad: I can't believe I'm not on here. How could I lose "best eyebrows" to Joey Pagoonis? He only has one.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘The Vasectomy One’ Quotes
Quote from Tim
Tim: I thought you were talking about the tube-tying thing.
Jill: Well, I am talking about tube-tying, except it's your tubes.
Tim: You can back up that clip ship right now.
Jill: Honey, it is much safer for a man to get a vasectomy than it is for a woman to have a tubal ligation.
Tim: Says who? The Wives with Knives Club?
Quote from Jill
Tim: A woman? You brought me here to see a woman?
Jill: I didn't know she was a woman. My gynecologist just said that Dr. Kaplan was the best urologist in town.
Tim: How am I supposed to talk to a woman about what's going on in manland?
Jill: Manland? Now you got a theme park between your legs?
Quote from Tim
Jill: Why don't you tell us what's involved in the procedure.
Tim: Yeah, I'm dying to hear this.
Dr. Kaplan: Well, the morning of your appointment, you'll have to shave in the area where I'll be making the incisions.
Tim: Shave? Here?
Dr. Kaplan: It's just a routine procedure.
Tim: Not in my house it's not. What do you think? I wake up, brush my teeth and shave ping and pong?
Jill: Well, you could go to a barber, but it might be a little awkward.