Al Quote #44
Quote from Al in Al's Fair in Love and War
Al: How'd you know I was here?
Tim: There's only twice places you go when you're upset, and your mom wasn't home.
Al: It's her bingo night.
Tim: You know, I think when Greta decided to go out with you, she kinda figured you'd be with her.
Al: I couldn't. I did what you said. I howled at the moon, I showed her the hairs on my chest, and she laughed at me.
Tim: You weren't actually supposed to show her your chest. It's just a figure of speech.
Al: Well, I'm not a wild man, Tim. I'm not like you. I'm a nice guy.
Tim: Well, thank you.
Al: Well, that didn't... You know. I just... I wish there was a way I could apologize to Greta.
Tim: I think there is, Al.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘Al's Fair in Love and War’ Quotes
Quote from Jill
Jill: It's just my diary from college. There's nothing that would interest you in here.
Tim: Really? Hey, what about that steamy night in Saugatuck we spent, huh?
Jill: There might be one short paragraph.
Tim: I bet it says something like. "Tonight, I saw paradise."
Jill: "And it was a very small island."
Quote from Tim
Tim: No, no, no. I promised I wouldn't touch it. [Randy starts to walk away with Jill's diary] Whoa. But that doesn't stop you from putting it out and accidentally opening it up.
Randy: Wait a second. This could be worth something. I could tell Mom about this.
Tim: And I could duct-tape you to a ceiling fan and force-feed you liver.
Randy: How's "August 22. 1974"?
Quote from Randy
Tim: Gather around, my sons.
Randy: What's up, Dad?
Tim: Tonight, we put a carcass on the grill, oil up our bodies, put our loincloths on and celebrate...
the first barbecue of the season. [grunts] And you'll notice, Daddy-o here has a 20-gallon steel cylinder filled with propane. I've increased the outlet valve of this twice over. Which means we'll be cooking with what?
Randy: The fire department?