Tim Quote #3521
Quote from Tim in Dead Weight
Al: Well, today we're going to show you how the experts work with the world's hardest stone, a diamond.
Tim: That's right. In case you just joined us, all the way from South Africa, we have a guest, expert diamond-cutter... Dirk Brodsky. Dirk comes from a long line of diamond-cutters.
Dirk: Oh, yeah. That's right. In fact, I've brought some diamonds cut by my great-grandfather.
Tim: We're looking forward to seeing your family jewels.
Dirk: Humor is such a tricky thing, isn't it?
Al: All right, well, why don't we show you how diamonds are honed using these machines?
Tim: All right. We'll start off with this little saw. What is this for?
Dirk: This is a rotary diamond saw. We cut away the unusable part of our rough diamond and it gives us perfect cleavage.
Tim: And we all know how important perfect cleavage is.
Dirk: Very tricky.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘Dead Weight’ Quotes
Quote from Al
Al: I was just thinking about my mother, all the great times we used to have. When I was a kid, she used to take us to the park. We'd fly kites, she'd push us on the swing. We'd spend hours on the teeter-totter.
Tim: I used to love the teeter-totter. Up and down. Up and down.
Al: Down?
Tim: Well, they play it differently in different parts of the country.
Quote from Al
Al: My mother was a great woman. She was my friend, my supporter, my teacher. And Tim's right. She said that there's nothing greater than sharing your love with someone else. And, well, there was something I was going to do the other night. And I don't think there's any reason for putting it off. Trudy, will you marry me? [off her reaction] Perhaps I've put you on the spot?
Trudy: Of course I'll marry you, Al. [applause]
Wilson: Al and Trudy, this is indeed a joyous occasion. Now, let us proceed to the grave site. Will the following pallbearers please take their places? Al, Cal, Tim, Brad, Mark, Marty, Benny, Patrick, Colin, Francis, Chris, William, Brian, Jake, Carson, Ted, Alonzo...
Quote from Al
Al: I'm taking Mother out to dinner to break the news to her first.
Jill: Oh! Well, that's a way to go.
Tim: And let me guess where you're taking her. Sven's All-You-Can-Eat Smorgasbord.
Al: No. As luck would have it... You know, they went bankrupt shortly after our last visit?
Tim: You know, I do remember seeing a white flag in their window, yeah.