Tim Quote #961
Quote from Tim in Be True to Your Tool
Tim: I didn't tell you about being on the road, though. Staying in hotels - you get to make a big mess and someone else cleans up after you.
Mark: Doesn't Mom do that?
Tim: Yeah, but the chambermaid doesn't give you those nasty looks. You get to eat all the food you want - get bloated and all gassy at night.
Mark: That doesn't sound so good.
Tim: Oh, but rental cars. You can do whatever you want to 'em. Commuter flights. "Is that wing supposed to be doing that?" Oh, boy. Staying up late. And talking to your kids by phone. Never being home for holidays. I hated doing that.
Mark: Dad, if you were a tool salesman, you'd never be home with us.
Tim: I wanna be home with you guys. I wanna do Tool Time. That's really the life I like.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘Be True to Your Tool’ Quotes
Quote from Wilson
Wilson: You know, it was Robert Ingersoll, a 19th-century lawyer, who said: "It is a blessed thing that in every age somebody has had the courage to stand by their convictions."
Tim: A lawyer said that?!
Wilson: On the other hand, I'm reminded of a general named Pyrrhus.
Tim: That's right.
Wilson: It was a Greek general who fought the Romans. His army won the war, but he lost so many men, it might just as well have been a defeat. Today we call that a Pyrrhic victory.
Tim: What are you saying? That this might not be worth the fight?
Wilson: It wasn't for Pyrrhus. It may be for you. You see, Tim, when it's a question of integrity, there are no easy answers.
Tim: I could come back. You're right, Wilson. This is really a pickle. And I don't mean that dill.
Quote from Tim
Tim: What are you gonna do with it?
Wes Davidson: Well, in the interests of the consumer, I've decided to hold off production.
Tim: [dramatic gasp] Isn't this the kind of guy you want selling you tools?
Audience: Yeah!
Tim: Uh, I got an idea. Heidi, would you bring out the Binford Big Boy ZX?
Heidi: Sure, Tim.
Tim: Here on Tool Time, when we have a tool or product that doesn't measure up to our standards, we give it an... Ooh! interesting farewell. Heidi? The Binford tool masher. Al, you wanna take the honors here?
Al: I don't think so, Tim. But perhaps Wes would like to. How about it, Mr. President?
Tim: All right! Just shove it right in there. Watch your hands! [machine whirring and clunking] And what we end up with... is the new Binford 6100... paperweight.
Quote from Tim
Tim: "Whoa" is right. Look at this. The new Binford 6100 reciprocating saw. [audience gasps] Phew! Huh? Every tool Binford makes goes through a rigorous quality-control system to make sure it's top of the line. And the Binford 6100... [Wes Davidson gives Tim a thumbs up]... bombed out big-time. Al, if you wanna walk away, I'll understand.
Al: I never walk away from a tool in need. That's right. The Binford 6100 bombed out of every single test we threw at her.
Tim: And... and I bet you're wondering who's responsible for making a tool like this. It's the new president of Binford Tools, Wes Davidson. He's right over there. A man who doesn't mind a bad tool. As long as it's made by somebody else. 'Cause if it says Binford on it, it's gotta be the best. I think Wes Davidson deserves a big round of applause. Wes. Come on over here, Wes. Come on! It's because of this man you'll only see quality products in your hardware store. Wes, tell us a little bit about the problem you had developing the 6100.
Al: Please, tell us.
Wes Davidson: I'd be glad to, guys. Uh, we found that the motor was a little underpowered.
Al: And the casing?
Wes Davidson: And the casing would have been a little stronger had we used metal.