Jill Quote #198
Quote from Jill in Where There's a Will, There's a Way
Jill: You know, we don't have to itemize. It basically just says that if I die you get everything... and if you die I get everything.
Tim: My stuffs so much cooler than your stuff. If you die, what do I end up with? That weird little pig oven mitt and that blender. If I die, you get the Binford 18-piece chisel and punch set.
Jill: Oh, well, now you see why I'm so desperate to get this down on paper.
Tim: But let's say I die and you remarry a young stud named Paco who's a bullfighter in Mexico. Then what happens?
Jill: I learn Spanish.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘Where There's a Will, There's a Way’ Quotes
Quote from Jill
Jill: I want you to look at some of this stuff.
Tim: Oh, come on. It's tied and the Wolverines need me. Please? Please?
Jill: No, I need you. Come on, you can miss an inning.
Tim: Inning? Why do you always bug me during the football game? Did I bug you during childbirth?
Jill: No, but you bugged me during conception.
Quote from Tim
Jill: "Upon your death, how and to whom do you want your assets to be distributed?"
Tim: Why are we always talking about my death? Let's talk about your death.
Jill: Statistics show it's much more common for the man to die first.
Tim: Yeah? Well, look what we have to live with.
Jill: And it's remarks like that that lead to those early deaths.
Quote from Jill
Jill: Tim, I'm gonna make an appointment with the lawyer. If you're even thinking about getting sick, go see a doctor.
Tim: Honey, I'm healthy as a horse.
Jill: Then see a veterinarian. When was the last time that you had a complete physical?
Tim: Honey, I... I go to the doctor all the time.
Jill: I'm not talking about the emergency room.