Tim Quote #270
Quote from Tim in Baby, It's Cold Outside
Randy: Hey, Dad, where's the food?
Tim: It's in the trunk of the car.
Randy: Why didn't you bring it? We're hungry.
Tim: I got halfway to the car, I turned right around, because I think my boys need some wilderness training.
Randy: What?
Tim: Listen, you can get lost in these woods pretty easy. So I have a little test for you. Where do you think the car is?
Randy: You lost the car, didn't you, Dad?
Tim: It's right where I left it.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘Baby, It's Cold Outside’ Quotes
Quote from Jill
Jill: "Insert the first two poles into the two sleeves. After getting two complete poles through the sleeves, you place the aluminum-tipped end into the grommet of the floor webbing loop." That's this.
Tim: Floor webbing... This. Okay.
Jill: Yeah. "By now it should be partially erect."
Both: The tent.
Quote from Wilson
Tim: Wilson, I thought I could do both, you know, and make everybody happy.
Wilson: Well, Tim, let me tell you a little story, about a doe. A deer. A female deer.
Tim: You're not gonna break into a song, are you?
Wilson: No, no, no, no, no, Tim. Anyway, once, when I was driving up here. I came across a young deer standing in the middle of the road. And my headlights were shining directly into its eyes. She started to move one way. Then she moved another way. And then she panicked, she froze. I had to swerve the car to avoid hitting her. Ended up running into a tree.
Tim: Whoa.
Wilson: Now, the deer was happy, but I wasn't. If she had chosen one direction and ran, we both would've been happy. [Tim mumbles agreeably] You see, Tim, when you try to go in too many directions at once, you end up going nowhere.
Quote from Tim
Jill: Oh, thank God. I was getting worried. I heard this awful howling.
Tim: Oh, that was me. Couldn't find any leaves. I had to use a pine cone.