Wilson Quote #38
Quote from Wilson in Baby, It's Cold Outside
Tim: Wilson, I thought I could do both, you know, and make everybody happy.
Wilson: Well, Tim, let me tell you a little story, about a doe. A deer. A female deer.
Tim: You're not gonna break into a song, are you?
Wilson: No, no, no, no, no, Tim. Anyway, once, when I was driving up here. I came across a young deer standing in the middle of the road. And my headlights were shining directly into its eyes. She started to move one way. Then she moved another way. And then she panicked, she froze. I had to swerve the car to avoid hitting her. Ended up running into a tree.
Wilson: Now, the deer was happy, but I wasn't. If she had chosen one direction and ran, we both would've been happy. [Tim mumbles agreeably] You see, Tim, when you try to go in too many directions at once, you end up going nowhere.
More Home Improvement Quotes
‘Baby, It's Cold Outside’ Quotes
Quote from Jill
Jill: "Insert the first two poles into the two sleeves. After getting two complete poles through the sleeves, you place the aluminum-tipped end into the grommet of the floor webbing loop." That's this.
Tim: Floor webbing... This. Okay.
Jill: Yeah. "By now it should be partially erect."
Both: The tent.
Quote from Tim
Jill: Oh, thank God. I was getting worried. I heard this awful howling.
Tim: Oh, that was me. Couldn't find any leaves. I had to use a pine cone.
Wilson Wilson Quotes
Quote from Bye Bye Birdie
Tim: I want Brad to be a good student.
Tim: So I told him that multiplying compound fractions is a real important part of that. But, you know, between you and me, it's kinda useless information.
Wilson: Well, I don't know about that, Tim. There was a time when I thought my extensive research into ancient tribal cultures, obscure scientific data, the thoughts of great philosophers, would never come in handy. Then you moved in.
Quote from Doctor in the House
Wilson: A Ph.D.?! Tim? Aw, Jill, Jill, Jill, Jill... Do you realize how many hours I had to study to get my doctorate in forgotten languages and extinct cultures? Oh, my, my, my. Sitting in that library, reading that insufferable microfilm till I thought I would practically go blind? Not to mention that to support myself, I had to volunteer as a subject for lab experiments. Oh, oh. And the thing that really irritates me about this whole thing...
Wilson: Oh, Jill, Jill, talk me down, talk me down.
Jill: I came out here so you'd talk me down.
Wilson: Oh, I'm sorry, Jill. I just lost control.