Jill: It's my hair, isn't it?
Tim: What?
Jill: You don't like the way I changed my hair.
Tim: I told you, I love your hair.
Jill: No. I had to ask you first.
Tim: Well, I love your hair. I love the way it smells. No bald spot.

Tim: How did your practice go today?
Randy: I fumbled three times.
Tim: Hey, hey, hey, buddy. You had a bad day. We all got bad days.
Randy: Yeah, there's a rumor going around that they're gonna make me a cheerleader.
Tim: Oh, no. You know, if that happens, make sure you get on the top of that pyramid. You don't want to be on the bottom of that thing.

Tim: What is it, Al? Fumes?
Al: No. I get... I get your point now, Tim. You respect me.
Tim: Huh?
Al: You really respect me. [hugs Tim]
Tim: We'll be right back after these messages from Binford Tools. It's OK, Al. Let go of me. Al, let go of me.

Tim: I know you were upset at the restaurant the other night.
Jill: Well... You know, it just bothered me that you couldn't go more than one minute without looking at another woman.
Tim: I think it had a lot to do with you and Karen talking about that all night, you know?
Jill: Oh, so if Karen and I hadn't been talking about it you would have been able to go, like, what? Two minutes?
Tim: Easy.
Jill: Hm. I know it sounds stupid, but sometimes when you look it makes me feel less appealing, you know, like I lost a little something.
Tim: Oh, you haven't lost anything. You've gained. [off Jill's look] No, no, no. You're best. You're the best. I think you're beautiful. You know that.

Tim: The truth is that what I did was just downright rude. It would be like burping in public.
Jill: And you do that all the time.
Tim: But not with other women. I save my best burps for you.
Jill: Oh, thank you so much.