Niles Quote #2035
Quote from Niles in Murder Most Maris
Roz: You've had it pretty rough.
Niles: What are my choices? I can go to pieces or I can bear up and live my normal life. Can I get a straw, please?
Waitress: Oh, sorry, sir, that was the last one.
Niles: I see. The last straw. Gosh, is it warm in here? [Niles starts to loosen his tie] It is. It is. It's warm in here. Oh, it's suffocating. [He removes his tie.] There, that's better.
Roz: I'll get you a straw, Niles. Do you need a straw?
Niles: Oh, no, no, you heard her. There are no more straws. [Niles removes his jacket] Oh, that feels so much better! [Untucks his shirt] Oh, everything was just so tight before. [Unbuttons his shirt] Ahh, yes! Oh, coffee shop without straws? [giggles maniacally] It makes no sense! [Removes his shirt and then his shoes]
Roz: You can borrow my straw, see?
Niles: [Niles loosens his belt and unbuttons his pants] Oh, this is great. I was being smothered. Oh, I can breathe. I don't know how you stand it! [Niles hops away as he takes off his pants]
Frasier Quotes
‘Murder Most Maris’ Quotes
Quote from Frasier
Niles: Oh, well, I'm- I'm stunned of course. The idea that Maris actually killed someone.
Frasier: Well, we've all seen her murder many a lively dinner party.
Niles: Frasier!
Martin: That's terrible.
Frasier: Oh, come on, I'm joking. And haven't I earned the right to my gallows humor? After all, are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a man now dead?
Quote from Frasier
Reporter: Is Niles Crane in here?
Frasier: He is not. I will be speaking on his behalf. Gentlemen, you may roll tape. [addressing the cameras] Good afternoon, Seattle, this is Dr. Frasier Crane, spokesman for the Crane family. Recent events involving my brother, Niles Crane and his ex-wife are tragic. Almost as tragic as the rampant media speculation concerning his involvement. If there is any justice in the world, Maris Crane and Niles Crane will soon be executed. Thank you. That is all I have to say.
Quote from Niles
Daphne: So where is she now?
Martin: They're holding her as a flight risk.
Niles: Can you imagine?
Martin: Well, it didn't help that when they found her, she had a passport, a wig, and $10,000 in her purse.
Niles: Maris always has those things in her purse.