Niles: Don't panic, Frasier.
Frasier: Don't panic? Yes, why should I have any reason to panic? My God, I'm only going to miss a celebration in my own honor, making me a laughingstock forever. And why? Because you spilt coffee on my shoes.
Niles: You're blaming me?
Frasier: Well, if you had the gripping abilities every species above the tree sloth was born with...
Niles: You should think back on the forty-five minutes you and your ego spent in that shoe store, trying on every pair of shoes, including the ones the manager was wearing!
Frasier: Are you calling me vain?
Niles: If the "Joan & David" fits...