Robert: Now, Timmy, that's a little rude. These kind people didn't come here to get insulted. [as Timmy] "Then maybe they should close their robes!"
Ray: What are you doing?
Robert: Now, Timmy, it won't do to have you talk like that while you're on duty, so let me remove your badge. "Gentle. It's nailed on. I hope the doctors here have some wood glue!"
Ray: That doesn't make sense. It's not a wood puppet.
Woman: Shh!
Robert: "All right. Now I can loosen up. Hello, doll face. What's your name?"
Margaret: Margaret.
Robert: "Well, you're a real looker. Maybe if you break your hip, I can be your splint. Ha-cha-cha-cha!" Easy, Timmy! I'm sorry.
Ray: He's not wood. He's made of plastic.
Robert: "Hey, folks, what do you think this guy's doing in the hospital, huh? Probably dropped in for an emergency nose reduction. Ladies and gentlemen, my cousin Pinocchio!"

Ray: All right, listen, Mrs. Gorman, I was just seeing if maybe I could get you to take your pills.
Mrs. Gorman: Fix my radio, I'll take a pill.
Ray: I don't know how to fix a radio.
Mrs. Gorman: Then you've used up what's left of my life for nothing.
Ray: Okay then. Well, nice talking to you, ma'am.
Mrs. Gorman: You sit in the press box?
Ray: What, at the game?
Mrs. Gorman: Yeah. I've never sat in a press box before.
Ray: Well, um, if you want to sit in a press box, you've got to get better. And if you want to get better you've got to take your pills.
Mrs. Gorman: Oh, you tricky, tricky white boy.

Ray: Wait a minute. Wait a minute. "Debra suggested"? You sent him in there?
Debra: Ray, I just... come on!
Ray: Oh, oh, oh! Dirty laundry is coming home to roost!
Debra: What are you talking about?
Ray: You wanted him to take my place so I could stay home and you could pretty yourself up and go out on the town with your face paint and your gewgaws! Yeah. You don't care about the old or the sick! You don't care that their entertainment now is a large man with his hand up the behind of a small plastic man! You were spending all your time there.
Debra: You were never here.
Ray: I was doing charity, and because it wasn't convenient for you, you wanted me to stop.
Debra: Ray, all l-
Ray: Buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-ba! I don't think you should be talking to me. I think you should be talking to... [points to the heavens]
Debra: But l-
Ray: Bhup!