Pat Quote #33
Quote from Pat in Pat's Secret
Hank: How long have you smoked?
Pat: 27 years.
Hank: Oh!
Pat: I'm sorry, Hank.
Hank: Smoking! Smoking! It's like you never listened to a word I said.
Pat: Oh, Hank, I listen to you all the time, and it's hard, because you're so overly certain about everything.
Hank: You mean like "Smoking is bad"? Well, why don't you just drink poison?
Pat: I have to tell you, Hank, I don't like that tone of voice. And I'll tell you something else: I think you're the reason I smoke. Now, you know I love you with all my heart, Hank, but I think if I didn't have my cigarettes, I would have to fight you. Oh, my goodness, that felt good to say. Thank you, Debra.
Hank: "Thank you, Debra"?
Debra: You're welcome.
Everybody Loves Raymond Quotes
‘Pat's Secret’ Quotes
Quote from Marie
Robert: All right. There was this new guy at work who smokes, and he's... And he's really popular, and I just wanted to fit in. But I didn't even like it. It made me throw up.
Marie: No more lying. You're a smoker!
Hank: Is everything all right?
Marie: Everything's horrible! Robert smokes!
Hank: No!
Marie: Don't you know that smoking can stunt your growth?
Quote from Pat
Robert: Oh, hi. Is everything all right? [Pat nods her head] What, can't sleep? [Pat shakes her head] Yeah, me neither.
[Pat finally breathes and lets out a puff of smoke]
Pat: Your mom's cacciatore was very spicy.
Robert: Wow!
Pat: Oh, Robert, please don't tell anyone I smoke.
Robert: No, no, I won't.
Pat: It's my dirty little secret. I don't smoke a lot, just three a day. I've tried to quit but they're so...
Robert: Addictive.
Pat: I was gonna say "wonderfully relaxing."
Quote from Pat
Robert: So, no one knows? Not Hank?
Pat: Oh, goodness, no.
Robert: Not even Raymond?
Pat: No. [Robert smiles]
Robert: So, if you don't mind me asking, how have you been able to keep it hidden?
Pat: It's not easy. I buy my cigarettes two counties over where no one knows me.
Robert: But you never smell like smoke.
Pat: I only smoke outside. I hold it downwind and I always have plenty of minty chewing gum. In fact, Hank thinks gum-chewing is my bad habit.