Chris Quote #506
Quote from Chris in Everybody Hates My Man
Chris: So, what you gonna do about it?
Walter Dickerson: It's not what I'm gonna do about it, it's what you're gonna do about it. I need you to do my history assignments for me.
Chris: Man, this is a lot of work.
Walter Dickerson: Come on, man, I thought we were cool.
Chris: What am I gonna get out of it?
Walter Dickerson: I'll owe you one.
Chris: You will?
Walter Dickerson: Yeah.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Even though doing Dickerson's work was like taking an extra class, I knew him owing me one would be worth it.
Chris: All right, I'll do it.
Walter Dickerson: My man.
Everybody Hates Chris Quotes
‘Everybody Hates My Man’ Quotes
Quote from Julius
Drew: I don't know how you can stand being around all those dead people.
Julius: I love it. It makes you realize that life is short. Anything can happen at any time. A toilet could fall out of the sky and crush you. A bus door could clamp on your neck and choke you. A poisonous lizard could escape from the zoo and bite you. You could fall off a bridge and drown. [3 hours later] And you could trip and fall in front of a power mower and be decapitated. [1:00 a.m.] [on the phone] You could be smoking a cigarette and blow up while siphoning 65 cents worth of glass. And you could eat some bad coleslaw and get diarrhea and die of dehydration. [the next morning] You could step in a puddle and be electrocuted by a downed wire. You could blow your nose and startle a cat with rabies...
Rochelle: Okay, okay, we get it! We can die at any time, and you're happy!
Julius: That's right.
Quote from Mr. Omar
Julius: Well, what's the job?
Mr. Omar: Well, my assistant died today.
Julius: Oh, no. What happened?
Mr. Omar: Well, he went to a dollar theater to watch the movie Airplane, when ironically, a chemical toilet fell out of an airplane, crashed through the roof and crushed him. Tragic. Tragic!
Quote from Julius
Rochelle: What's going on with you?
Julius: What are you talking about?
Rochelle: You're singing and dancing and willing to pay for finger waves and earrings?
Tonya: Are you leaving us for a White woman?
Julius: No. It's just being at this new job, I'm with dead people everywhere I go. It just makes me feel like I need to appreciate life a little more. Oh, this is good! What is this, baby?
Rochelle: Vegetables.
Julius: You kids try this? Chris, pass me the big piece of carrot.