Woody Quote #822

Quote from Woody in Love Me, Love My Car

Carla: [answers phone] Cheers. Hello. Hello? Cheers. Turn the phone around. Right side up. Right side up! Yeah. That's much better. Ah. Woody, it's your dad.
Woody: [takes the phone] Hi, Dad. Hello? I can't hear- [turns the receiver around] Dad! You're kidding. Oh, my God. That's unbelievable. Wow! Well, that's... I'm relieved. Well, say hi to Mom, okay? All right. Bye. [hangs up] Miss Howe, you aren't gonna believe this. Guess who showed up in my folk' back door last night?
Rebecca: Who? Snuffles.
Woody: Yeah, I guess he found his way onto the back of a truck that was headed that way. I- I told you he was smart.
Rebecca: I can't believe this. You see, he traveled all that distance to get home where he was safe and sound. This is a Christmas miracle.
Woody: I'll say. [to Norm] Mom said he was delicious.

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 ‘Love Me, Love My Car’ Quotes

Quote from Woody

Cliff: Actually, I'm something of an expert on that subject.
Carla: Big, funny-shaped cans?
Cliff: No, Carla. I happen to be a swine buff. You see, your porcine mammal is known for his superior intelligence.
Woody: Well, that's true. You know, back in Hanover, they say pigs are smarter than the people. Actually, it's usually the tourists who point that out.

Quote from Sam

Sam: Oh, here you go, pal. Let me, uh... [laughs] Sorry. I don't have any change on me.
Salvationist: That's all right. God bless you anyway.
Frasier: Hey, Sam.
Sam: Hey, Frasier, how you doing, man? [to the Samaritan] I tell you, I used to have change all the time, but things are tough now. The bar burned down, you know. This is the place right here. Yeah, burned down, and I've been spending every dime I have just to rebuild the place. I don't have anyone to blame but myself really. And women. Oh, God. [laughs] Me and women. Oh. Yeah, I tell you, I think... I think it first started for me when I hired this really bright, blonde waitress, you know. Her name was Diane. Maybe you heard about her. Used to come in and out of here all the time. Five years ago, books under her arm... [time lapse] And then Rebecca, you know, finally admitted, "Yeah, I burned the bar down." I forgave her.
Frasier: Good night, Sam.
Sam: Yeah, good night, Fras! And then, listen to this. Rebecca finally admits to me, "Yes, I burned the bar down." Whoo, was I mad, I tell you. But what are you gonna do? Are you gonna stick her with guilt the rest of...
Frasier: Sam?
Sam: Yeah?
Frasier: There you go. [returns the Salvationist's hat]
Salvationist: Thank you.
Frasier: Come this way. Oh. Here you go. [puts money in the Salvationist's hat] You earned it.

Quote from Rebecca

Rebecca: Oh, Woody, look. He's so cute. [baby talk] Yes, you are. You're so sweet. [normal voice] Oh, he's shivering. Should we cover him with something?
Woody: Well, not really. Maybe with some honey glaze and a little pineapple.
Rebecca: That is disgusting. I can't believe you'd even think about killing something this sweet.
Norm: Rebecca, where do you think hams come from?
Rebecca: Big, funny-shaped cans on aisle six.