Rebecca: Can you believe it? Her first day on the job and Evan's little tart is late. That's because she knows I can't do anything about it because her lover boy is the big boss. Isn't she just the queen of gall?
Cliff: Oh, no, that was Charlemagne's wife, I think. Well, you know, if memory serves, I think her name was Cathy.

Annie: But ever since I started working here, he's become insanely jealous. "Why am I late? When am I coming home? Why am I dressed like such an ultra-fox?" I mean, if it weren't for the six times a day we make love he'd be no fun at all.
Norm: Six? Whoo! Can't think of anything that I can do six times a day. Hit me again. [slides over empty beer glass] Will you, Sam?
Sam: Listen, it's kind of tough on a husband, you know, to have his wife supporting him. It's a- It's a pride thing.
Norm: It is a pride thing, Sam. I remember once when I was out of work, Vera had to support us. I tell ya, the day that woman left to deliver phone books... The proudest day of my life, actually.

Paul: Hey, anyone see the conclusion of the White House Murders last night?
Frasier: No! Don't say anything. I've got it on tape.
Norm: Did you believe it was the vice-president?
Frasier: Please!
Woody: How about where the First Lady popped out of a pool of her own blood and strangled the Russian ambassador?
Frasier: No! No!
Woody: Yeah, that was my reaction exactly.
Frasier: Well, thank you, one and all, for ruining yet another plot for me. I'll be off, now, but before I go there's something I'd like to share with you. In Citizen Kane, Rosebud is the name of his sled. In Murder on the Orient Express, everyone did it. And Luke Skywalker's father is Darth Vader. Ha!
Cliff: Ah, why doesn't the guy tell us something we don't know, huh?
Woody: Darth Vader is Luke's father?