Sam: You know something, though, you know, uh... While I'm here, you know, I have... l have this friend who's got a problem, and maybe you could do him a favor, and- and write him a note, huh?
Receptionist: Saying what?
Sam: Oh, it doesn't really matter. Just, uh, well you know, uh, "To whom it may concern"... Uh, "Sam Malone," that- that's my friend, uh... "Sam Malone has a very, very high sperm count. Go ahead and have plenty of sex with him." Maybe, you know, sign it down here at the bottom. If you want to, you know, put that into, uh, medical terms, that'd be cool.
Receptionist: I can't do that.
Sam: There's 30 bucks in it for you if you do.
Receptionist: You're Sam Malone, aren't you?
Sam: Yeah. How'd you know?
Receptionist: Believe me, this happens all the time. The doctor has an opening. Would you like to see him?
Sam: Yeah. All right. Yeah. Whatever. Listen, uh... You really don't use a machine, do you?