Lucille Quote #234
Quote from Lucille in Queen B.
Narrator: So Tobias was glad for the break in Lucille's sessions so that he could work on it.
Tobias: This woman is a villain.
Lucille: You think I'm a villain, too? My children are all waiting for me to die so they can divvy up my stuff, my Chinese gang mates were getting ready to noodle stab me, and even one of the guards called me "Gangie," and he was talking about the monster movie. He thinks that horrible monster looks like me! So fine, you want to call me a villain, I accept it! I'm your villain!
Tobias: Actually I was writing down a casting breakdown for the role of Lucia for my Fantastic Four musical.
Lucille: This was all about your stupid play? I was about to cry for the first time in 60 years. I remember when the last time was, too. I hid under Mama's porch during a thunderstorm and I found the remains of my...
Tobias: It's not a stupid play. It's a musical. And I have to debut it on a boat at Cinco.
Lucille: It's on a boat?
Tobias: Yes, I'll sign everyone out for the night, but I guess I'll have to play the old sea bitch myself.
Lucille: I'm in.
Arrested Development Quotes
‘Queen B.’ Quotes
Quote from Lucille
Narrator: And so it was Lucille who did the questioning of her new star witness, Lucille 2
Lucille: Thank you so much for coming to be my witness. You're such a large shareholder... Oh. I've made a pun.
Lucille Austero: Oh, how could I not do it for my oldest friend? Oh! Now I've gone and done a double.
Lucille: [laughs] A double. Like your pre-surgery chin.
Lucille Austero: Or your post- breakfast drink. Oh, I wish you'd come to my rehab clinic. But anything to help that Keystone Cop family of yours.
Lucille: Keystone Cops? Your references are as fresh as the wallpaper in the room of that pretend child you've had all these years. But, my friend...
Lucille Austero: You're right, I shouldn't joke. None of your family showed up, you poor thing. This is such a black mark on all of you.
Lucille: You should know about black marks. Your pillow must look like a Rorschach Test. Not that there'd be anyone to see it. So, as I was saying...
Quote from Lucille
Lucille: If I were you, I'd put a tail on him. Get a P.I.
Michael: Where the hell am I gonna find a P.I.?
Gene Parmesan: Gene Parmesan, at your service.
[The bearded, middled-aged White man wearing a baseball cab and standing between Lucille and Michael removes "GARY" from his name tag to reveal "GENE"]
Lucille: [screams] It's Gene! He does this to me every time!
Michael: What's he doing here, Mom?
Lucille: Oh, he's working for me.
Michael: Why'd you scream then?
Lucille: I thought he was that guy. [points to a Black man]
Quote from Lucille Austero
Narrator: But unfortunately, their 30 year passive-aggressive dance was losing some of its passive.
Lucille: As if everybody in this room couldn't tell how jealous and conniving you are, my dear Lucille Austero.
Lucille Austero: What I knew was that you were stealing for years. We all did! That's why nobody was surprised when you stole that boat.
Lucille: And I knew you couldn't wait to get your liver-spotted claws into my company!
Lucille Austero: Says the woman whose liver can be spotted from outer space!
Lucille: No further questions!
Lucille Austero: No further answers! Am I done?