George Michael: Maeby, what are you doing? You know, I still don't get why you're pretending to be two people, and why is one of you sick?
Maeby: Hey, you don't get giant checks if you're healthy. Plus, who's going to get mad at the dying girl?
George Michael: Surely's dying?
Maeby: I figure I'll kill her off just before graduation. Just so everyone gets really sad before prom.
George Michael: Maeby, someone's going to get hurt. Not to mention it's kind of disrespectful for kids who actually have this.
Maeby: Not a lot of kids have B.S. these days.
George Michael: What does that stand for?
Maeby: I don't know. It's B.S.

Michael: Can we let another family bring down the Ten Commandments? This family's already done more than its share.
Gob: Oh, now you love the Ten Commandments. And yet, you're the one who so conveniently forgot "Thou shalt protect thy father and honor no one above him unless it beith me, thy sweet Lord."
Michael: I'm not sure that one made it down the mountain, Gob.

Lindsay: Yes, we did it. We're getting rid of the Ten Commandments. The granite ones in front of the courthouse. You know, all it took was the threat of a lawsuit.
Michael: You're involved with those protesters now? When did that happen?
Lindsay: Oh, who can remember.
Narrator: Lindsay's involvement began hours before when, leaving the plea hearing, she first determined the Ten Commandments didn't belong there.
[flashback:]
Lindsay: And they won't even allow me one lousy cigarette! [walks into the granite block]
Lucille: Honey, they're just heels. They can only support so much weight.
[present:]
Lindsay: I've always been very passionate about the separation of church and state.