Tobias: My wife is humiliated. This is my chance to right the small wrong that I did.
Michael: You shot her in the ass with about four ounces of horse tranquilizer.
Tobias: I haven't been the perfect husband. Yes, I admit that. But now is my chance to be a hero. Please, Michael, give me some of your money.
Michael: I've got $5,000, and I need that for Sally, but if you wanna make a low bid-
Tobias: Five thousand dollars.
Auctioneer: For that? Sold. [Lindsay collapses]
Michael: I think you overpaid.