Dick Quote #1165

Quote from Dick in Dick's Big Giant Headache Part 1

Big Giant Head: I love you people! I love your airplane. I love to fly. Does it show?
Harry: Look at this loser. [Sally laughs]
Big Giant Head: Hello! Is this any way to greet your supreme leader? [all salute]
Dick: Welcome, o great and glorious leader, whose presence in which we, your humble and insignificant subordinates are barely worthy of basking.
Big Giant Head: Right. This is some body I picked out. Pretty good, eh?
Tommy: Nice abs.
Sally: So, how was your trip, sir?
Big Giant Head: Horrifying, at first. I looked out the window, and I saw something on the wing of the plane.
Dick: The same thing happened to me!
Big Giant Head: Anyway, to calm me down, they gave me something called... alcohol.
Dick: We never would have known.
Big Giant Head: Let's get on a flight to jersey and get another round.
Dick: No, no, you don't have to, sir. That bar over there serves alcohol.
Big Giant Head: Hot diggity! I love this planet already.

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 ‘Dick's Big Giant Headache Part 1’ Quotes

Quote from Vicki Dubcek

Vicki Dubcek: Hey, hon, what are you looking at? Oh, my God! You're going to your prom?
Alissa: Yeah. What's wrong?
Vicki Dubcek: Well, it's just- See, I never- I never got to go to my prom. It was supposed to be the most beautiful night of my life. Just me and Freddy Steckel.
Harry: Hmm. Like in your tattoo?
Vicki Dubcek: But something terrible happened that night. Freddy never made it to my house. As he was getting into his car in his driveway... his wife caught him and made him come back inside.
Alissa: That's sad.
Vicki Dubcek: I still have my pretty prom dress in my closet. Sure, now it's old... faded... stained with my tears. Do you wanna see it?

Quote from Harry

Harry: Oh, great. I guess I just have to stand here and twiddle [voice quavers] my... Incoming message from the Big Giant Head.
Tommy: Dick, Sally! It's the Big Giant Head!
Harry: The Big Giant Head has evaluated your mission, and you have been issued a score based on the color scale of the visible light spectrum.
Tommy: What?
Harry: Your mission has been adjudged... orange.
Dick: Hey, that's great.
Harry: Orange is very bad. On a scale of 1 to 10, it's, like, a 2.
Dick: Oh, damn!
Harry: To reevaluate your mission, the Big Giant Head is on his way to earth. He will arrive tomorrow between the earth hours of [robotic voice] 9 a.m. and 3:30 p.m. [normal voice] Someone from the mission must be home during this time. Transmission ending in 3, 2, 1... [sneezes]

Quote from Dick

Tommy: He's gonna yell. There will be lots of yelling, and then the hitting.
Dick: How dare he? He's never even been to this planet. He has no idea how hard it is to be a human.
Sally: Wait. "Be a human"? My God, you guys. Maybe that's our problem. We've become too damn human!
Dick: What are you talking about, Sally?
Sally: You see? "Sally." You used to call me "Lieutenant."
Dick: Well, we've adapted. We're emulating an earth family. Earth families don't refer to each other by rank. They use more familiar terms, like "you" and- and "bastard." And... "you bastard."