Dick Quote #121
Quote from Dick in Truth or Dick
Dr. Byron: Gentlemen, we have a guest member of the rules committee with us tonight. Dr. Solomon, would you care to share with us some of Dr. Albright's feelings?
Dick: Oh, yes, of course. Well, first, on behalf of Dr. Albright, I would like to say welcome to this big waste of time. I'd say I've always wanted to put a face with those men whom she affectionately calls "The Night of the Teaching Deadd." And may I say you do not disappoint. I can tell at a glance that you indeed are a mindless and dull group. So, I would like to start with a fresh idea that you won't recognize when it bites you on the ass.
Dr. Byron: Excuse me, does Dr. Albright know you're speaking on her behalf?
Dick: Don't move! Stay where you are! [whacks Dr. Byron's forehead with a newspaper]
Dr. Byron: Dr. Solomon.
Dick: Freeze! He's still there! [whacks him again] Oh! You have a mole. A big, ugly mole.
3rd Rock from the Sun Quotes
‘Truth or Dick’ Quotes
Quote from Dick
Dick: Do you notice how this James Brown is always getting somewhere? He's getting up, getting down, getting back.
Sally: You know, we should contact him. I mean, as part of our mission to study life on this planet.
Dick: Yes, but according to this, he's more of a machine. A sex machine.
Quote from Dick
Dick: On the subject of universal truth, Albert Einstein once said... [speaks German] Any thoughts on that? Anyone? Yes, Caryn.
Caryn: Dr. Solomon, I think you were speaking German.
Dick: Yes, German. Einstein spoke German. [sighs] Okay, I'll simplify. "Scientific proof is nothing more than conditional truth." We all understand what truth is, don't we? Now, I have three of Einstein's equations on the board. Two of them are false, and one is true. Who can spot the true one? Anyone? How many of you think it's number one? [all hands go up] I'll give you a hunt, it's not number one. Here's another hint, it's not number two. How many of you think it's number three? [all hands go up] Well, you're wrong. I lied. I made them all up! You see, lying accomplishes nothing. You can't trust someone who lies. Oh, you work with them. You think you know them. They ask you to substitute. You make a fool of yourself. They get mad. And your sister can't even get a driver's license.
Pitman: Dr. Solomon, is this going to be on the final?
Dick: The point I'm making is, you have to tell the absolute truth, or else you just end up confusing people.
Caryn: But, Dr. Solomon, sometimes you just can't tell the truth.
Dick: But why not?
Quote from Harry
Sally: You know, cars must have some huge power we haven't discovered yet. Look at this. The lines, the waiting, the testing.
Harry: Yeah. Can you imagine what you must have to go through to get a gun?