Dick: Surprise!
Mary: Oh, my God!
Dick: Now you have a TV on the ground floor.
Mary: That's the biggest TV I've ever seen. How did you afford this?
Dick: Well, I sold your grandmother's antique end tables.
Mary: What?
Dick: Actually, that only covered the down payment. You have 12 more monthly payments of $265.00. [turns TV on] Gunsmoke!