Dick: The truth hurts, doesn't it, Martha? But there's no space-age titanium hip replacement to mend Mary's broken childhood.
Martha Albright: "Mary's broken childhood." Puh-lease. Mary was loved, Dick. Mary had a lovely home, Dick. Mary went to the best schools... Dick. We even bought her a pony when she was eight.
Dick: A pony?
Martha Albright: Yes.
Dick: Mary never told me that.
Martha Albright: And when she was a teenager, [gasps] what a handful. Do you know I had to lace her orange juice in the morning with crushed birth control pills.
Dick: So... So you made sure she got her vitamin C and kept her from getting knocked up? That is so caring.
Martha Albright: All right, I was hard on her. But I just wanted her to be the best Mary Margaret ever. I loved her, Dick. And I still do. I just love her.
Dick: I never realized there was another side to the story. The mother's side. Martha, from now on, you will want for neither gratitude nor affection, because, gentle Mother, I will tend to your every need.
Martha Albright: Oh, Dick. I have to go to the john.
Dick: I'll ring for the nurses.