Jo: [on video chat] Why is this my problem, Michael?
Michael Scott: Because Gabe tattled. I was perfectly happy to just hide it from you.
Gabe: Those overnight packages needed to go out, and Michael refuses to hold the guilty party accountable.
Jo: Lower yourself, Gabe. I don't wanna be having a conversation with your crotch. Okay, educate me now why you won't fire the boy.
Michael Scott: You don't have all the facts.
Jo: Which are?
Michael Scott: I love him.
Jo: Oh, God. How far has it gone?
Michael Scott: No. No. He's my nephew.
Jo: Well, I got a nephew, too. But he don't work for me. You know why? Cause he's a screw-up. He can swim in my pool but he can't come in my house.
Michael Scott: Well, this office is my pool. And my house is my house. And I just want my nephew to work in my pool.
Jo: If you keep him, Michael, I'm gonna hold you accountable for him. You're on the hook for this kid. You got that? Cover his ass like tighty-whities.
Michael Scott: I will cover his ass like moss on a Mississippi tree stump.
Jo: Was how I put it not clear enough? I mean, you had to go and make up your own saying? Deal with it, boys.