Axl: Hey, Dad! How was the drive home from work?
Mike: Silent, same as always.
Frankie: Aw, don't be like Marianne... walking away.
Axl: Hey, Dad, Axl and the Ax-Men are looking for a new member. Do you only play air guitar, or do you have experience with other imaginary instruments?
Mike: Am I really the most important part of your lives? This is all you can focus on? 'Cause your mom farted at the Donahues', and that was only a half-day discussion. This has been going on for two days.
Sue: We know mom farts. We didn't know you sing.
Mike: I wasn't singing. The radio was singing.
Frankie: Oh, come on. You were beltin' it out. I bet people three cars away heard it.
Sue: [gasps] Do you have any other hidden talents we don't know about?
Mike: I know how to change the locks on this house.