Michael Quote #222
Quote from Michael in A Fractured Inheritance
Michael: She's a kid. You can't disembowel her toys.
Eleanor: Fine. New plan. You casually mention that you're rich and seduce Donna. When she goes for you, it will prove that this whole thing is a sham. First things first, do you have a penis?
Michael: I will not seduce Donna. For one thing, I could never do that to my pal, Dave. It goes against the architect's code. Also, your mother seems happy here.
Eleanor: The Donna I know wouldn't be caught dead in this suburban boredom factory. She's scamming them. Look, believe me, don't believe me. I don't care. I'm gonna prove it.
Michael: Young lady, you will stop this nonsense, go to the PTA meeting and support your mother. I won't hear another word about it.
Eleanor: What the hell was that?
Michael: Well, I was going for the "stern but, you know, caring dad" vibe. No? Didn't work?
Eleanor: No, not even close... like, not in the ballpark.
Michael: I was trying something, Eleanor. Give me a break.
The Good Place Quotes
‘A Fractured Inheritance’ Quotes
Quote from Tahani
Tahani: Ugh. Maybe we should just go. There are plenty of other people I could help, like my good friend Ben Affleck and his crippling addiction to back tattoos, or my other good friend Matt Damon and his crippling addiction to my friend Ben Affleck.
Quote from Michael
Eleanor: So my mom is alive, and she lives here. Why didn't you tell me sooner, man?
Michael: I had already told you that you died and that I had tortured you for centuries and that you're doomed to be tortured again. I just didn't want to be, like, a bummer.
Quote from Eleanor
Eleanor: Oh, hey. Who the hell is this chick?
Dave: This is my little potato pie, Patricia. And who might you be, by the way?
Donna: Eleanor is my sorority sister.
Eleanor: Right. Good old Kappa Zeta... Jones.