Michael Quote #120
Quote from Michael in Existential Crisis
Michael: There they are! Que pasa, muchachos?
Eleanor: Hey there, bud. You okay?
Michael: Okay? I'm a new man. Oh, Eleanor, thank you so much for the advice about shoving my feelings down deep. I feel so much better. It's like I'm surfing on this wave of positivity.
Eleanor: Is that Janet?
Michael: Oh, yeah. Have you met my secretary, Jeanette? She's a lot like Janet, but she doesn't pretend like she has all the answers.
Chidi: Hi, Jeanette.
Janet: Oh, no, it's still me... Janet. Michael just asked that I change my appearance, and also say things like, "You're so funny," and "So how many quarterbacks are in a home run?" [giggles]
Michael: Man, repressing your feelings is great. I was feeling stressed all the time, and now it's just so easy. Babe, we need to get some food into you. Get you something to eat.
Janet: I don't eat anything.
Michael: She's perfect.
The Good Place Quotes
‘Existential Crisis’ Quotes
Quote from Michael
Michael: So that's their plan.
Jason: This doesn't seem so bad.
Michael: Yeah. It really tucks my nuggets. I worked so hard on my torture ideas, and theirs are so basic. These millennials, they have no work ethic. Oh, sorry, a millennial is someone who has only been torturing people for a thousand years. Millennial.
Quote from Tahani
Tahani: I would say I outdid myself, but I'm always this good. So I simply "did myself".
Quote from Eleanor
Eleanor: I don't know if what I'm going to say is going to hurt or help, but screw it. Do you know what's really happening right now? You're learning what it's like to be human. All humans are aware of death. So we're all a little bit sad... all the time. That's just the deal.
Michael: Sounds like a crappy deal.
Eleanor: Well, yeah. It is. But we don't get offered any other ones. And if you try and ignore your sadness, it just ends up leaking out of you anyway. I've been there. And everybody's been there. So don't fight it. In the words of a very wise Bed, Bath, and Beyond employee I once knew... "Go ahead and cry all you want. But you're going to have to pay for that toilet plunger."