Eleanor: Ugh! Sorry, can I just vent to you for a second? Chidi is so annoying. I just... I cannot believe that he is the one I'm stuck here with.
Mindy St. Claire: Uh-huh, wow, crazy.
Eleanor: Oh, sorry. Jeez, man, I thought you could be human for, like, two seconds and listen to me.
Mindy St. Claire: I have, Eleanor. I have listened to you talk about Chidi 15 times in 15 different ways. Let me just cut to the chase. You two, you got it bad for each other.
Eleanor: No, we don't. Chidi's just a friend. What am I saying? He's not even a friend. He's just a weird teacher that I hate. [Mindy picks up a VHS tape] Dude, I do not want to watch Cannonball Run 2 right now. All right, what happened in the first one, so I'm all caught up?
[A video of Chidi and Eleanor in bed together plays]
Eleanor: [on tape] I don't know what's gonna happen to us, but I need to tell you something. I love you. And you don't need to respond 'cause I know you have trouble saying how you feel...
Chidi: [on tape] I love you too.
Eleanor: [scoffs] Very funny, but that... that's obviously not real.
Mindy St. Claire: Oh, that's real, baby. That's real nasty. [chuckles] Yeah, this was, like, the sixth time you guys were here. I saw you getting sexy the previous three times, so I cut a little hole in the wall so I could tape you. Call it my lookin' hole.
Chidi: [on tape] Is that a camera?
Eleanor: [on tape] Mindy, you pervert!