Michael: "Speaking of Chidi" is something no one has ever said, because no one talks about Chidi, because no one likes Chidi, because he's so annoying about ethics. Now, when you taught the Trolley Problem, did you secretly wish that it could be you who wound up under the trolley? Because all your students did. Whoo! Oh, Chidi, sorry, I got a joke for you, bud. Uh, knock knock.
Chidi: Who's there?
Michael: You died alone, because you couldn't commit to anyone.
Jason: You died alone because you couldn't commit to anyone who?
Eleanor: No.
Michael: Jason Mendoza! Okay, that's all my time. Let's tear this mother to the ground! [all cheer]