Will Quote #769
Quote from Will in Bundle of Joy
[fantasy:]
Shantay: I'm sorry, dear. Did you want something?
Will: Yes, I'd like to know what pods these kids came from.
Shaquille: Actually, Father, we came from a zygote. You see, in human reproduction...
Will: Uh, knock it off. Ever since you won that Nobel Prize you think you're so doggone smart.
Shantay: Honey, you seem tense.
Will: I am tense. Everybody all perfect, baby, I don't know.
Shantay: Why don't I send the children away and dress up in that French maid's uniform and give you a nice hot-oil massage?
Will: You, you, you! Why must everything always be about you? What about my needs?
Shantay: I'm sorry, honey. What do you want?
Will: I want a girl with extensions in her hair and bamboo earrings, at least two pair. I want kids that pick their noses sometimes and roll me when I'm drunk. I mean, I want a dirty house. No, I want a dirty house. I want to argue in public, you know. I want you to have a headache sometime. I want a regular life. I want a regular marriage.
Shantay: Sweetheart, you seem upset. Let's all give Daddy a great big hug.
Will: No! No!
The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air Quotes
‘Bundle of Joy’ Quotes
Quote from Will
Will: [recording] Now we are entering the kitchen. This is where we eat. [looks at Uncle Phil] Some of us more than others. And this is your mommy and she look like she eating for a couple of brothers herself.
Vivian: Will, what are you doing with that microphone?
Will: Uh, making a tape for the coming attraction. You know, I was going to knit some booties or something but you know, I had to get yarn and needles and I'd have had to learn how to knit. See, look, Uncle Phil, the concept is to aesthetically capture for posterity the sounds that are familiar to this house.
Philip: Will, I'm eating.
Will: You'll hear a lot of that.
Philip: You're grounded.
Will: Okay, that about sums up Uncle Phil.
Quote from Will
Will: Hold it there, home fry. Say a little something to spud.
Carlton: Hey, little bro, piece of advice: Don't lend Will a penny even if he begs, and he will.
Will: That's your brother Carlton. You'll recognize him, he'll be the one at eye-level.
Quote from Will
Will: Man, I can't wait to start my own family. Yo, I want to have a whole bunch of kids, like six and I'm going to have them one right after another.
Carlton: Will, we're talking about kids, not malt liquor.
Will: Carlton, why don't you shut up before we send you back to that White family that dropped you off on the doorstep?