Jonah Quote #55
Quote from Jonah in Color Wars
Jonah: And you know what? This is not gonna help, but I was this close to making a $1,000 sale, and then I opened my big, fat mouth and talked him into spending $2,000.
Amy: Shut up. No way.
Jonah: I did what you said. I did not take "No" for an answer.
Amy: Oh, my God.
Jonah: And every time I felt bad for the guy, I just thought, "Hey, look, it's either coming out of his pocket or Amy's."
Amy: Yes! Oh, my God, I love you so much right now. Um, get back to work.
Jonah: Okay.
Superstore Quotes
‘Color Wars’ Quotes
Quote from Garrett
Garrett: Trust me, you don't want the RX 5. The Vilano Forza's the way to go.
Man: The RX 5 got five spokes on RoadPro, and it's half the price.
Garrett: Mm, okay.
Man: What's that mean?
Garrett: [sighs] Look, man, I used to own the 5, okay? And it was good... till the pedals came loose when I was crossing a busy street. [gestures to his legs]
Man: Oh, I... Oh, I'm sorry.
Garrett: But, hey, you know what? I like to focus on the positive. I'll ring you up for the RX-5.
Man: Actually, let's go with the Vilano.
Garrett: [chuckles] Hell, yeah! And let's get you one of these fancy racer helmets too. "I wish I had a better helmet" was my first full sentence when they taught me how to speak again.
Quote from Garrett
Garrett: [to a customer] "I wish I would've bought a Vitamix" was the first thing I said when I woke up from my coma. Could save your life, man.
Jonah: How exactly did a non Vitamix blender put you in a coma?
Garrett: That's a very offensive question to ask a disabled person.
Quote from Garrett
Garrett: [over PA] Attention, Cloud 9 shoppers, we'd like to welcome the members of our Second Chances Program in the gold T-shirts. If you'd prefer to work with someone who hasn't committed a violent crime, our red-shirted employees will be more than happy to help out. Yes, the Cloud 9 Second Chances Program... 'cause knowledge is worth 100 bucks.