Jerry Quote #348
Quote from Jerry in The Alternate Side
Rental Car Agent: Sir, the estimate on the damage to your car is two thousand eight hundred and sixty-six dollars.
Jerry: Hmm, well, I got the insurance and everything so...
Rental Car Agent: Yes, now, uh, in your report you said that you were not the driver of the car at the time of the accident.
Jerry: That is right, somebody else was driving.
Rental Car Agent: All right, well, sir, you're only covered for when you're driving the car.
Jerry: What's that?
Rental Car Agent: You're not covered for other drivers.
Jerry: Other drivers?
Rental Car Agent: Um-hmm.
Jerry: Your whole business is based on other drivers. It's a rented car. That's who's driving it, other drivers. Doesn't my credit card cover me or something?
Rental Car Agent: Not that particular one.
Jerry: Well, I got a hundred cards, here, pick a card, take a card, any card you want, go ahead, whichever one, I don't care.
Rental Car Agent: Sir, if you had read the rental agreement--
Jerry: Did you see the size of that document? It's like the Declaration of Independence, who's gonna read that?
Rental Car Agent: Mr. Seinfeld, as it stands right now, you are not covered for that damage and there is absolutely nothing that can be done about that.
Jerry: These pretzels are making me thirsty!
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Alternate Side’ Quotes
Quote from Kramer
Kramer: What happened here?
Elaine: I don't know. I don't know. What should we do? We called an ambulance. Does anyone know first aid?
Jerry: Shouldn't you do something with the extremities?
Elaine: What extremities?
Kramer: What's an extremity?
Jerry: Well, you raise the feet, get blood to the head.
Kramer: No, you raise the head, you get blood to the feet!
Quote from Jerry
Rental Car Agent: I'm sorry, we have no mid-size available at the moment.
Jerry: I don't understand. I made a reservation. Do you have my reservation?
Rental Car Agent: Yes, we do. Unfortunately, we ran out of cars.
Jerry: But the reservation keeps the car here. That's why you have the reservation.
Rental Car Agent: I know why we have reservations.
Jerry: I don't think you do. If you did, I'd have a car. See, you know how to take the reservation, you just don't know how to hold the reservation and that's really the most important part of the reservation, the holding. Anybody can just take them.
Quote from Kramer
George: You got a line in the Woody Allen movie?
Kramer: Pretty good, huh?
George: You're in the movie? Is he in the scene?
Kramer: Oh, yeah, yeah, it's me and him. I might have a whole new career on my hands, huh?
Jerry: You mean a career.
Elaine: So was Mia Farrow there?
Kramer: Uh, I didn't see him.