[stand-up:]
Jerry: Have you noticed that every place you go into lately has that tip jar on the counter? What is the service that this tip is for, anyway? I mean, isn't the man basically just turning around? Isn't that really all it is? I think we're tipping people now just for the absence of outright hostility. "Thanks very much. Here's a little extra for not taking my head and smashing my face through the glass countertop. Really good service here."