[stand-up:]
Jerry: If you are a waiter or a waitress and you ever see me in a restaurant, I'm telling you right now, I don't want to hear about the specials. I don't want to know about the specials. I'm sick of the specials. I hate the specials. My feeling is, if the specials were so special, they'd be on the menu. You know what's special about them? They don't know if anybody likes them. They always have those overly creative descriptions of the specials too, you know. The veil is lightly slapped, and then sequestered in a one-bedroom suite with a white wine intravenous.