Elaine: I'm not afraid of death. I mean, if I got a heart, that would be great. Still, if they told me it was never gonna happen, I think that'd be OK, too. It's the waiting I can't take. I just wanna know one way or the other, you know?
Dr. Cox: I got an idea. Why don't we switch to a cheerier subject?
J.D.: What do you think death is like?
Elaine: I really hope it's like a big Broadway musical. Everyone's all dressed up, and singing to the rafters, and you go out with a real flourish.
J.D.: I think it's like a game of dodgeball. There's a lot of chaos and screaming. And eventually, you get your glasses snapped in half by the big kid who already has underarm hair. But then you wake up in the hot nurse's office, and when she leans in to put that bandage on your nose, you get a sense something could happen if you took a chance and buried your face in her knockers.
Dr. Cox: Holy cow, I'm so sorry. I guess, for my part, I think death is a lot like that story, quite frankly, but if there is a God, it'll be a lot quicker and half as painful.
Elaine: It's fun to annoy him.
J.D.: It's what I do.