Johnny: And, there she is! Hot off the presses!
Alexis: Alexis Rose.
David: Why is there a line through it?
Johnny: Oh, toner must be low.
Moira: This certificate reminds me of the one you were awarded for getting your braces off. Now that was a grand day.
David: Yes, except my orthodontist had a slightly better printer.
Alexis: I'm sorry, did David spend four months earning a degree?
Moira: Alexis, we're equally proud of you, dear.