Craig: Good evening. May I assist you with a wine tonight?
Tom: Yeah, I'm having fish, so maybe a full-bodied... red?
Craig: You know, sir, you might want to consider something white to go with your fish.
Donna: No. Red. And bring some ice cubes. I like ice cubes in my red wine.
April: I'll have a glass of your most expensive red wine mixed with a glass of your cheapest white wine, served in a dog bowl. Silly straws all around, please.
Craig: I'll be right back with my recommendations.
Tom: Seems to be keeping it together.
Craig: [screams] What kind of monster orders red with fish? I know they're messing with me, and it's just a test, but have some decency. [returns]