Ranger: So what happened? Did you forget to check the entire field? I find a lot of women have problems with tunnel vision.
Leslie Knope: No. I'm an excellent hunter.
Ranger: How did you end up shooting a guy in the head then?
Leslie Knope: Fair enough. I was walking in the woods and then I tripped and my gun went off.
Ranger: Ah, so you forgot to put the safety on.
Leslie Knope: No, I always have the safety on. I'm... While I was tripping, I saw a quail and I shot at it.
Ranger: In mid-trip?
Leslie Knope: No, that's... Okay, fine. I got that tunnel vision that girls get. And that's what happened. End of story.
Ranger: I think you're hysterical because of all the excitement, obviously. So, I'm just not following your story. All right?
Leslie Knope: I let my emotions get the best of me. I just... I would... I cared too much, I guess. I was thinking with my lady parts. I was walking and I felt something icky. I thought there was gonna be chocolate. I don't even remember. I'm wearing a new bra and it closes in the front, so it popped open and it threw me off. All I wanna do is have babies! Are you single? I'm just, like, going through a thing right now. I guess when my life is incomplete I wanna shoot someone. This would not happen if I had a penis. What? Bitches be crazy. I'm good at tolerating pain. I'm bad at math. And I'm stupid.