Natalie: What's going on?
Captain Stottlemeyer: There is a private detective in San Diego named Rafferty. He works with the homicide squad down there as a consultant. A couple of weeks ago, they were chasing down some creep and Rafferty had a heart attack. Creep gets away. Now Rafferty's suing the city, the city's suing Rafferty, it's a train wreck.
Adrian Monk: Okay. So what does this have to do with, you know, me?
Captain Stottlemeyer: This is from Sacramento. It is a statewide directive. Effective a week from Monday, any civilian crime scene field consultant must pass a mandatory fitness test.
Natalie: Fitness test?
Captain Stottlemeyer: The California Physical Agility Test. The candidate must run a half a mile in four minutes then climb ten flights of stairs, do 20 pull-ups, and then scale a six-foot high wall.
Adrian Monk: Or?
Captain Stottlemeyer: There is no "Or." There's no "Or" on this page, Monk. Either you pass this fitness test or you can't work here anymore.