Claire: [on the phone] Haley, I love you. If you don't want to work in that store, I'll help you find something you like better.
Haley: Is this reverse psychiatry?
Claire: No, honey. Actually, nothing is.

Lily: I want a cheeseburger.
Cameron: But this is a special soup called pho.
Lily: You told me not to say that word.

Alex: I need caffeine today.
Claire: You can have juice. How late were you at that party last night?
Haley: Oh, please. She snuck in at 10:00 and spent all night reading under the covers with a flashlight.
Claire: Alex, what have I told you about staying out past your curfew?
Alex: I need to do it more often.