Quote from Jay in Snip
Receptionist: Is there a Phil Dunphy here? Jay: I'm his father-in-law. He's gonna need a moment. Is there anything I could fill out for him? Receptionist: Not unless you want the vasectomy. Jay: Where were you six months ago? Receptionist: Barbados. Now I really need to speak with the patient. Jay: Got it. Phil, get over here. Phil? Man: [in agony] He just ran ou- Jay: You know what could do wonders for your business here? A recovery room.