Reese Quote #421
Quote from Reese in Reese Joins the Army: Part 1
Reese: Beth. Are your parents passed out yet?
Beth: Yeah, but what are you doing? I thought you were working late. Why are you dressed like that?
Reese: Because I've been thinking about this moment for a long time, and I want it to be perfect. Beth, I have something to tell you. Beth... I love you. I love you. I love you.
Beth: Oh, God. This is going to be so horrible for you. I am so sorry.
Reese: What do you mean?
Beth: I want to break up.
Reese: Oh. Yeah, yeah, that's okay. Yeah, that's fine. You know, I was just kidding anyway about... yeah. It's no biggie. [romantic music is played outside]
Beth: Look, Reese. It's not you, it's me. I just think I can do better. I think we should end it now before things get even... Can we stop that music?
[After Reese gives a signal to stop the music, an array of white doves are released]
Reese: I should go.
Malcolm in the Middle Quotes
‘Reese Joins the Army: Part 1’ Quotes
Quote from Reese
Sgt. Hendrix: Well, troop, you've polished your boots before everyone else. How on God's good earth did you accomplish that miracle?
Reese: I just did it exactly the way you told me to. Remove laces, pull tongue forward, apply polish, pull tongue backward, buff, replace laces, repeat. I did the same thing to make my bed and secure my foot locker.
Sgt. Hendrix: Well, that's the most miraculous turnaround that I've ever seen. I want you to explain to these recruits how the worst soldier in the unit has managed to put them all to shame!
Reese: I just stopped thinking. I figured out that using my brain was the whole problem... not just here, but my entire life. If I just do exactly what I'm told and nothing else, then everything gets easy. It's not even a question of smart or dumb. You just turn yourself into a tool. I'm much happier that way. I'm the world's happiest tool.
Sgt. Hendrix: You must be proud of yourself, son.
Reese: I don't know if I am or not. I'm waiting for you to tell me.
Sgt. Hendrix: My God. A soldier like you comes along once in a thousand years.
Quote from Hal
Lois: Oh, Jamie finally fell asleep. Haven't you finished paying these bills yet?
Hal: How am I supposed to know which ones to blow off? "Ultimate Final Notice" is obviously more serious than "Absolute Final Notice," but pink is angrier than yellow, and this one's still saying, "Please."
Quote from Hal
Hal: Ooh! Sorry, Officer. Excuse me.
Police Officer: You in a hurry?
Hal: You know, busy day. You understand.
Police Officer: Is that your backpack?
Hal: Oh, uh, no, no. Absolutely not.
Police Officer: Better check it out. [unzips bag] Whoa! I think we got a bomb here. You got to get out of here.
Hal: No, I-I can't.
Police Officer: Sir, I need you to step away to a distance of at least 150 feet.
Hal: I can't do that. I'm... I'm... I'm in the bomb squad.
Police Officer: What?
Hal: That's right. You better let a professional handle this. Damn. I was a week from retirement. You get to safety. I'll take it from here.
Police Officer: Yes, sir.