Ted: [v.o.] Well, one night, we were throwing a party to celebrate... something. I can't remember what, when a pretty girl I had never met noticed the book on the table.
[flashback:]
Steph: I can't believe you have this book. I just finished reading it. Teddy Roosevelt was the coolest guy ever.
Ted: A unicorn.
Ted: [v.o.] I couldn't believe it. It was a stroke of luck on par with the 50-page manuscript in Roosevelt's pocket... that helped slow that would-be assassin's bullet.
[present:]
Marshall: Dude, come on.