Marshall: You don't see anything wrong with that story?
Ted: Well, I lost my new phone back at the club somewhere.
Marshall: What the hell is wrong with you, dude?
Ted: You know me, I lose things.
Marshall: You kissed a married woman, Ted. You committed credit card fraud. You... You kissed a married woman. Do you know how offensive that is to me? You're turning into Barney. We don't need another Barney.