Future Ted: [v.o.] After a very long night, it was finally the big holiday. Sorry, the two big holidays.
Lily: Oh, Marshall, are you working on the cranberry sauce?
Marshall: In a minute, baby. I've only got so many hands. You see what I got going on here? They're turkeys, but they're also hands, because later, we're going to eat turkey... and then I'm going to slap you in your face.
Barney: Please, you took out all the suspense. In a horror movie, the killer does not grab a bullhorn and announce, "Attention, unsupervised teens here at the lake house: At precisely 3:00 a.m., I'm gonna jump out of that closet right there and hack you all up with a machete. P.S. fire is my one weakness."