[2019:]
Ted: Wait, you're messing with us, right? You didn't really get a girl pregnant?
Barney: It's real. She's pregnant.
Marshall: Kinda puts an asterisk, on the whole perfect month thing, huh?
The Mother: Barney, are you okay?
[Jim Nantz appears next to Barney in a puff of smoke]
Barney: Ah, Jim Nantz. Thank goodness. You're always here for me in times of trouble. What should I do?
Jim Nantz: You're on your own this time, bro.
[Jim Nantz disappears in a puff of smoke]
Lily: Congratulations, Papa.
Barney: Stop it. This is a disaster.
Lily: Why?
Barney: Why? Because I'm too old. I was about to enter my golden years. My Clooney years. My daddy issues years, where I don't just remind messed-up girls of their dads because I'm emotionally distant. I freaking look like their dads. That's the dream. My life is over.